Friday, October 23, 2020


 If you consider the best of the best in any profession – sports, sales, trial lawyer, great public speaker or even singer/entertainer, they've already “done this before many times!”, ‘before the big game’ or the big presentation or the big stage. It’s exactly like they did it in practice.  That's the secret of effective performance!

So why throw your teenager into the game or world of life – without practicing?

You KNOW they will be faced with many large and small decisions and choices –and talking them through with their trusted advisor – YOU – can only help their decision-making!



STUDYING [or avoiding]


If you lay out or describe an actual, probable situation with them – and either ASK them how they’d handle it, what they’d say – or suggest what they might say – you have the basis for discussion.  They may disagree [probably?] – but you will have introduced your point.

And be as specific and detailed as possible.  Adults have a tendency to speak to young people in generalities and assume their teen will directly apply it to a situation. 

Don’t allow them to say “I’d say something like _____”  Make them tell you the exact words they would say.  THEN you have the basis for practice and refinement. Mastery in any endeavor comes from practice!!

Remember – the simplest way out of a conversation is for your teen to say “yes, I understand” = when in fact they either don’t understand or don’t care.  STAY THE COURSE.  Don’t be militaristic – don’t get loud or emotional –and in many cases, you may choose to come back to this issue at a later date.  Remember - almost all learning requires repetition!!!  

Oh, and of course – one of your best tools in connecting with teenagers – HUMOR!  Make them laugh, even at your expense.

And - if you have questions or comments or an issue you’d like to discuss, email us at