We are bombarded with How-To messages, lessons, sermonettes, advice. Let’s whittle them down to The Three ABSOLUTES for SUCCESS for Your Teenager, drawn from 25+ years in the success trenches - coaching, observing, advising, failing, rebounding… These are THE THREE key, top, critical components: Without them, your student is committed to a life of mediocrity! And WITH THEM, even if they’re average in all other areas, they are essentially guaranteed success.
Here’s why: we’ve been told repeatedly that knowledge is power. IT IS NOT! Like a battery, knowledge is potential power – but it’s useless until and unless it’s connected to something – to life, as it were! To connect that battery, the three attributes below are the ‘connecting cables’ to success! And as reported by college officials, far too many college students are significantly lacking in these three traits.
1. The stamina and willingness to rebound after a defeat. No one has ever achieved anything of significance without failing along the road to success. And if you’ve shielded them from failures or defeats, they have probably not developed this capacity. [hopefully, not your teenager.]
2. After suffering a defeat, it’s crucial to LEARN from that setback. REMEMBER - a failure is a mistake you didn’t learn from. If they keep repeating the same mistake over and over, success is getting no closer! As a parent, it’s OK for you to ‘comfort them’ - “oh, it’ll be OK” – but then move quickly on to “what did you learn?” This can take time, effort and exploration. Recognize that it’s overly simplistic and virtually worthless to say “work harder.” Your student needs specifics: do more of WHAT? Do LESS of what? Focus on what specific area or element? And if they were ‘lazy’ – there’s A REASON they were lazy: didn’t really care, didn’t really know what or how to it. This is where you explore, ask, ask, and ask, deeper and deeper.
3. The final prerequisite building block is true and real goal-setting. If your student/ teen/ young adult can’t convert a wish or a dream or a hope into a real goal, they don’t yet have it.’ Real goals are specific and measurable. If that hope or dream isn’t either of those, they aren’t goals. And if they’re not specific and measurable, you’ll never know if or when you arrived. The pursuit of goals IS LIFE – whether family and relationships, business or professional success or physical health, etc. Goals need to continue THROUGHOUT life!
As we said at the top, if your teenager possesses and APPLIES these attributes, they WILL SUCCEED – even if their “potential” is only average. And if they don’t, you can pretty well bet they will fall short of their true potential throughout all of life.
And your key role as a parent is to check, assure or help them obtain these traits and habit patterns. DO NOT ASSUME they know and do these things!! If you’d like an assessment tool please contact us at CoachSteve@Launch-Your-Life.com for further information or guidance! SUCCESS!!